Homecoming Talk

Einen schönen guten Morgen, liebe Geschwister!

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This is the first time in 18 months where I've stood in front of a pulpit and spoken in English. Quite frankly, it's a little nerve-racking, considering today I won't be able to blame any mistakes I make on a language barrier. But I take comfort in the fact that there are so many beautiful, smiling faces in the crowd. I've prayed for guidance when I speak today, and I trust that the Spirit will be able to touch your hearts in some way.
I chose as a theme, "The Love of God".
Love, as defined in Gospel Topics, "is a feeling of deep devotion, concern, and affection," and it states that "the greatest example of God’s love for His children is found in the infinite Atonement of Jesus Christ." There are so many facets to this gem of truth that I won't even begin to try and examine each of them today, as much as my heart aches and yearns to do so. Instead, I will focus on how I came to learn this for myself.
Toward the end of my mission, my mission President asked each of us to memorize 8 scriptures that strengthened our testimony - 4 from the Book of Mormon and 4 from the New Testament - and said that he would ask us to recite a couple of them in our next interview. I wanted to choose the best ones, so I started flipping through my physical and electronic scriptures, scanning the pages for my markings. I was almost at the end of the New Testament when I found a scripture that just perfectly summed up what I had learned over the course of my mission: "Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love. In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because that God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him." (1 John 4:7-9)
When I read that, I was overcome by the Spirit. I thought back on the experiences I had had throughout my life, and especially on my mission, that had shown me how aware God is of each of us, and how much He loves us.
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Every missionary's "glory and joy" are their converts (1 Thess. 2:20). The Alpenländische Mission being what it is - that is to say, what's classified as a 'difficult' mission - I really only worked with 3 recent converts throughout the course of my service. Although their three stories are vastly different, they all had one giant similarity: they had all drastically changed through learning about the Gospel. As I spoke with each of them, I learned things about their past that I couldn't even imagine had ever happened to them. More than one had questioned the worth of their lives, and all three had been brought to the breaking point. But God, in His infinite love, reached in and kept them going. He gave them hope. As much as I love all three of these dear friends, I'm going to focus now on one of them.
In my last area, I was introduced to a literal angel. She worked in a flower shop and grew up on a farm. She seemed to live and breathe nature, and always had an air of hope about her. I wouldn't have been surprised to see flowers literally springing up from each of her footsteps, and I'm half convinced that the only reason I never saw it happen was because we lived in the city and we consequently normally only walked on asphalt and cobblestones. She radiated light and goodness and her hugs were like warm blankets on a cold winter day - even in the middle of summer. To me, she is the personification of love. I didn't learn her full story until I had already worked with her for a while. Before she joined the church, she was depressed, consistently angry, fought often with her family, and tried to hide her pain through such consistent alcohol intake that she even labeled herself as an alcoholic. She came to believe in God because of an experience one fall that awakened something inside of her, and she began to search for truth. She read the Bible in secret because her circumstances were such that those around her would have been very angry if they found out. She bounced from church to church, searching for something to fill the emptiness inside of her. Eventually she settled on one because she felt close to God during the prayers and music, but she was a little frightened by the showiness of the actual actions of these people. A year ago August, she decided she had had enough. She went into the forest and prayed, pouring her heart out to God. She gave Him an ultimatum and said that if God wanted her to find the truth, she would find it by the end of the year. Otherwise, she was going to stop trying and go back to her old life. I forget exactly when, but some time after this forest prayer, she was walking home from work. And instead of going directly home, she decided to take a roundabout route through the city. She turned a corner and suddenly, she was staring at a black name tag. It read Elder so-and-so, and she didn't quite know what it meant, but then she read "The Church of Jesus Christ". She looked up at this tall, French Elder, who proceeded to ask her a question similar to: "What role has religion played in your life, and what does faith mean to you?" She was so excited to have someone to talk to about this, that she just went off about how she had been searching for truth. He led her back to the street display, where there was a sign that said, "The future is as hopeful as your faith!" She was ecstatic. But then she saw the Book of Mormon. The preacher in her church had taught her that this Book was the devil's book, and she was about to leave when the Spirit whispered to her heart: "You said you were going to trust God to lead you to the truth. This could be it. Don't turn away. Stay and listen, and trust in Him who loves you." So she stayed. She was given the Book of Mormon, and she took it home to start reading. When she met with the missionaries for the first time and they taught her about Joseph Smith's story, she knew that this was her answer. He had been her - he was confused and went into the forest to pray. Because of her connection with nature, she knew that this was God's way of telling her that this story was true, and consequently so was the church. She quickly gained a testimony of the Book of Mormon and all that the missionaries taught her. When they invited her to be baptised, she asked if they had a date in mind. They did. It was December 30th - the last Sunday of the year. She cried because she knew that God had heard and answered her prayer. She agreed to be baptized, and now, almost a year later, she's preparing herself for an eternal marriage.
As amazing and miraculous as that story is, and as much as God's love for her was evident in the way her prayer was answered, I want to focus on how the Atonement helped her in her journey. At the beginning of this story, I shared how she had been angry, lost, and confused. Somehow, through the course of her search for truth, she became joyful, a beacon of light for others, and confident in herself and Christ. She repaired relationships with her family members and supported her younger brother in his own trials amid the mists of darkness. Hearing this conversion story of not just her faith but her very being strengthened my faith in Christ and His Atonement. God loved her enough to send His Son to earth to make it possible for her to overcome her past and transform into a new creature. Miraculously this power works in each of our lives. God loves YOU enough to have sent His Son to make it possible for YOU to become YOUR best self.
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The next story I would like to share today is my own. My mission was hard. Incredibly so. I was blessed with difficult companions and difficult areas, difficult members and what seemed like difficult everything. There were transfers where I cried myself to sleep several nights in a row and more than once the thought popped into my head that I should just give up and go home. BUT. This is where the beauty of the Gospel comes in. Every time I questioned why I was still there, the Spirit would flood my heart and remind me of the blessings I had. Even among these difficult times, I still had such amazing experiences that the thought of going home would actually make me laugh. I would think back on the amazing people I met and worked with, and each point throughout the day where I could plainly see God's hand in my life. I was humbled when I saw that God loved me so much. And even though my circumstances didn't change right away, my perspective would, and I would know that He had helped me to hold out until things got better. I know that my story is not unique - there is a reason missionaries come back changed, and why people say missions are hard; they test every fiber of your being and push you to the point where you HAVE to rely on Christ. It's a lot like life in general, actually. We each chose to come here, and we each have our own individual trials and challenges. Many of us might question what our purpose is and wonder why we even try in the first place. Life is HARD. Incredibly so. But if we only focus on the difficult, then we have the wrong perspective. After all, "we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." (Romans 8:28) This was true on my mission, and this is true in our lives. God is calling you. He loves you. Everything will work together for good, and even though it may be difficult, at the end it will be eternally worth it.
And you know what? Not even just at the end! I don't only feel joy right now, having come home from my mission. It's not like this is the first time in 18 months where I've smiled or been happy or even seen the Blessings of my service. I felt all of these things throughout the course of my mission - several times, consistently, and frequently. And it's the same with life. We aren't only promised blessings after we've made it to the Celestial Kingdom - we can have these blessings now! Wouldn't it be absolutely depressing if this life were only created to test us, and not to bless us? Thanks be to God, that He loves us more than that.
But how do we feel this love, even during the hard times? How can we be happy when it feels like the world is against us?
We find an answer to these questions in John 15: "If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in his love. These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full." (John 15:10-11)
When we keep the commandments, we will not just occasionally feel love, we will abide in it. We won't just sometimes have joy, but it will remain in us. Abide and remain are both words of consistency; they don't flicker on and off or phase in and out. They are endless.
During the hardest times of my mission, God was my constant. I knew I could turn to Him and Christ for help. The greatest help I received came through Jesus Christ, in various ways, but always through Him. Christ's Atonement doesn't just cover our sins, as amazing and important as that is. Rather, in Alma 7, we find a list of the various trials that He helps us to overcome: pains, afflictions, temptations, sicknesses, death, infirmities, sins, and transgressions. One of my companions explained it this way: If this life is a test, then Jesus Christ is the cheat sheet.
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If any of you have encountered a problem that you just can't seem to work out on your own and it seems as though you are destined to fail this test, or if you're on the opposite end of the spectrum and you feel like this test is so easy you have to be missing something because it just makes too much sense, or if you're anywhere in between: I invite each of you - yes, every person in this congregation - to do two things. My brothers, I'm looking at you. 😉
1: Think of a commandment that you might be slacking in. If you're having trouble thinking of one, start with examining your daily personal prayer and scripture study, or maybe say a prayer and ask God, "What lack I yet?" Take whatever commandment you've thought of, and study it. Find not just the how of the commandment, but the why. Why do you think that God wants you to keep it? Why are you going to start to keep it? Why are you going to continue to keep it? Make a goal to be a little better with this commandment for the week. Evaluate your progress, and renew your resolve for the next week. And then the month, the year, and the rest of your life. This is a part of repentance, and repentance is a lifelong process.
2: Rely on Christ. Repentance isn't possible without Him, and neither is my first invitation. So pray to God for help through Christ. If you feel yourself starting to slip, turn to Christ. Pray, study about Him, acknowledge His hand in helping you to become better. In so doing, you will feel His love for you and God's love for you. You will have joy.
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Trying every day to do better and to be better, and relying on Christ in the process. That is what brings us joy in the darkness. I know this because I have felt the despair that settles in when you forget to turn to Christ, and I have felt the contrasting joy when you do rely on Him. I'm sure you can guess which one feels better.
I actually have one more story to tell. It happened almost two weeks ago. We decided to go on a hike up to a WWII bunker for our Distrikt pday, and we were all excited about it. But pretty early on this hike, it was clear that it was going to be more difficult than we thought. One sister in our group was feeling sick, but she was determined to push through. The Elders gave her a Priesthood blessing, and we kept going. Somehow, she managed to make it to the top of this mountain, but by the time she got up there she was throwing up and fading in and out of consciousness. We didn't know how we were going to make it back down. The trail had been incredibly difficult, this Sister was losing what little strength she had left, and the sun was starting to set. We were stuck between a rock and a hard place, almost quite literally. Tense words were exchanged, prayers were said, and promptings were followed. Through the grace of God, we made it back down this mountain and safely home. I'm going to be honest, it was probably one of the scariest experiences of my life. But as I've pondered over it, I've been recognizing more and more blessings. On the way home, we had each talked with each other and agreed that our testimonies had been strengthened by that experience. There is so much that I could talk about in regards to the Priesthood, faith, prayer, angels, positivity, humility, hope, charity, friendship, etc etc, but I want to tie this story into the love of God, as that was my main takeaway.
As I said at the beginning of this talk, "love is a feeling of deep devotion, concern, and affection," and "the greatest example of God’s love for His children is found in the infinite Atonement of Jesus Christ." We certainly felt God's deep devotion, concern, and affection for us up on that mountain, and we also felt the power of the Atonement. Although we each recognized the seriousness of the situation we were in, and we knew that getting down the mountain was almost an impossibility, we each remained calm. We had small moments of doubt or fear, but they quickly passed and our overall feelings were those of hope, unity, faith, and peace. I know how emotional I can be, especially when I'm scared. But for some reason, on that mountain, my mind was clear. And not for some reason, but because of Christ. Because He suffered for me, I know that He knew how and what I was feeling, and he was able to take my doubt and fear and replace it with a calm assurance that everything was going to be okay.
We each have our own mountain stories. We will all one day be placed in a situation where we don't know how to move forward and we're paralyzed by our circumstances. Perhaps one of you today is stuck in a WWII bunker at the top of a mountain with fading light and no way home. But I promise you that if you turn to God in the darkness of that moment, He will be there waiting for you. He loves you. He wants to save you. And He has sent His Son to help you back down your own personal mountain.

To close I would like to share (a hymn and) my testimony.
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"God loved us, so he sent his Son,
Christ Jesus, the atoning One,
To show us by the path he trod
The one and only way to God....
Oh, love effulgent, love divine!
What debt of gratitude is mine,
That in his off’ring I have part
And hold a place within his heart."
(God Loved Us, so He Sent His Son)
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[Testimony auf Deutsch]

Im Namen Jesu Christi, Amen.